Have you ever thought about all the bad words we listen – the worst meaning ones – that they all have female connotation? And that, most of times, when a fatality happens – raping, cheating, abortion – society finds a way to blame the woman? “She was dressed inappropriately“, “she didn’t handle her husband” or “she was the irresponsible who wanted to get pregnant“. Among other atrocities.
So in front of lots of facts that, unfortunately, prove that women are still humiliated in society, it is just unacceptable someone to say that “feminism is useless”. That women are fanatic just because they want equal rights and that “respect is something that you have to conquer”. Wait a minute: respect is something that each one of us HAVE TO feel to any other human being. It is our obligation, by the way, to respect every other living creature. So don’t tell me that someone has to conquer my respect or yours, when respecting is everyone’s obligation.
But today I want to talk about another subject which, by the way, is completely connected to those other ones I’ve mentioned before – and it is unknown, unfortunately. Have you ever heard about SORORITY? Let’s have a look in our friend, sir Dictionary:
“So ro ri ty” – female name; 1. family relationship between sisters; 2. union or friendship between two women that became familiar to sister’s relationship; 3. united women’s association for a common objective; 4. female solidarity” [DICIONÁRIO DA LÍNGUA PORTUGUESA, Editora Porto, 2016 – translated].
Besides all the explicit meaning of this word- which explains my intention here in this post -, what else do you think ‘sorority’ means, in practice? That women need to stop attacking each other. I’ve lived that a lot and unfortunately I still do – and it is not only in professional life. I am going to tell you a short true story, that will be an example of real life. Of my life.
A few months ago I’ve suffered some graves accusations about being told something, a “gossip” in a group of friends about someone I barely know (of course this doesn’t make sense. Why the hell I would spend my time talking about someone I don’t know? Whatever). I’ve made a comment about the person, innocently, of something I’ve saw and this was the start of a huge gossip – someone who listened to what I’ve said went to the person and told her things I’ve said – but this person lied or made the real thing looks bigger and graver. As a result, this person – the one I’ve mentioned things about – started hating me a lot. I don’t know what they have been told her but here is the fact: there were another ones involved in this case, men and women, but the one who’s got accused and called by names was me. Only me.
I was the ‘bitch from hell’ that told bad things about the “poor little girl”, I was “the gossip one that is jealous about the other one” and some other bad things like that. I am the one who receives mugging behind my back in this group of girls – because “I don’t deserve to have friends, because I am a really bad person that I have done that”. It is so sad that I want to laugh. You know how it is: the girl is always the bitch and the guy is always innocent, no matter what he has done. There is always a good reason.
Was the stupidity of this girl so huge that she never stopped to think that I’ve never had the intention of defaming her? That what she does about her life is only her matter and that I’ve innocently mentioned something about her? That maybe the other persons had the cruel intentions, who listened to me and then told her things that wasn’t true? And you know what is the worst? That when something like that happens, involving gossip, hating and arguments the most involved ones are the women. Woman attacking another woman; woman talking bad things about the other woman; woman humiliating another woman; the man is NEVER involved. And one thing that makes me sick about humanity is that there is a lot of people like this girl from my story.
People that should look for a gossip to check if it is true, before hating someone, but they don’t do that; it is easier for them to reply bad things back or cultivate hate for the other one (women, most of times). The devil is always the woman. The injustice begins in the Bible, when the story says it was the woman who ate the forbidden fruit of Heaven. See?
This sad story I’ve told you was only an example of so many stories that happens in the world. With me, with you. And this is the huge problem: sorority is missing in the society. We have being treated like objects for so many years that we haven’t being thought how to love each other, how to respect each other. We don’t know how to fight for our friend’s rights. The way we lived for so many years only made our selfishness grow. And we forgot about solidarity and about we are all women before anything.
We should fight together, for the same cause, and respect each other as equals. When you say your friend is a “sun of a bitch” you are offending your mother, your sister, your daughter. You are offending every women you know and love.
Think about that.
